A journey of ‘Discovery’
When we arrive, Dad is often asleep in what everyone calls ‘Bill’s chair’. Three lady friends protect that chair for him, making sure it’s always available. It’s very sweet.
‘Discovery’ is a small community and other residents in the bungalow often recognise us. We say hello, maybe have a chat. When Dad’s awake I tell him our news, although it’s difficult to chat for long. Instead we might play dominoes; it helps to have plenty of games and things to do.
In the summer we go outside. Everyone congregates in the sensory garden. It’s a wonderful space and a good way to get Dad up and about. The ladies are often sitting in the sunshine, other families are out for a stroll and a chat, but there’s always room for privacy. Everyone gravitates towards the aviary and the birds. Sometimes there’ll be a cream tea, in the garden if the weather’s good, or in the clubhouse.
When we visited the other day, Dad was singing French songs that he learnt at school. We joined in and then so did everyone else. It was just a lovely moment.
At first I wasn’t sure whether The Russets would be right for Dad, how he would respond to people with more complex conditions, but he has adapted very well. He displays concern about others and others are equally caring towards him. In fact it’s probably been harder for us to adjust.
Dad has vascular dementia but he is still recognisable as Dad, with the same personality. We weren’t prepared for the way different dementias can affect different people. The experience has been challenging and thought provoking, often stretching our ability to understand. The care and support staff have amazing depths of kindness and patience. They seem to know just how to help, what to say. A few careful words and they can ease residents’ anguish and anxiety. Jude will give Dad a peck on the cheek and he beams.
You can’t underestimate the challenges of loving someone who has dementia, of coping with the impact this has on their lives, but we have real comfort in the knowledge that The Russets is the best place Dad could be, with the best possible dementia care we are ever likely to find for him.
Keith Hanson, relative of a resident in Discovery, The Russets
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A sense of purpose
It’s 10.30am when Reg decides to get dressed. He’s normally an early riser, one of the first up for breakfast, but today, for whatever reason, he’s having a lie in.
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Maltesers with Margaret
A night shift at The Russets and I’m in the kitchen, snuggled up in my dressing gown....
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